Sunday, December 07, 2008

Being Intelligently Selfish - The key to total success

Being Intelligently Selfish - The key to total success
According to Wikipedia Selfishness denotes the precedence given in thought or deed to the self, i.e., self interest or self concern. It is the act of placing one's own needs or desires above the needs or desires of others. Selfishness is the opposite of altruism (Selflessness).
We, as human beings have needs, lots of them, and so have our peers. If we take an outer look at what is near us, at all the people, and all the actions those people take, we can elaborate some interesting conclusions. All of us have a degree of selfishness within us. This quantity of selfishness determines our level of success in life. 
If all the time we think only to ourselves, and none of the time to the people close to us, we will sooner or later wake up being all alone -- this is something that is rarely a real wish.
If, instead, we think at ourselves, but looking at us through the eyes of the persons we have contacts with, we get to see things in a very different manner:
    - if your wife/husband/girl/boyfriend is happy, she/he makes you happy -- very happy -- so make them feel you are there for them, whatever you do, do it for them, and they will do whatever it takes to keep you and make you happy.
    - if your boss is happy, if your company is happy, you will definitely be happy, because they will not want to lose the person who makes them happy
    - if your co-workers are happy, they will try to do their best keep YOU - you will get to be happy
    - if you make a stranger you meet by chance happy, he will try to stay in contact with you for as long as its possible, you will start to build successful relationships wherever you go and with whoever you meet.

If you make the universe happy, the universe will make you happy back. Do whatever it takes to make everybody around you happy. A free compliment, a good sweet word said by heart, a kind smile - everything counts for the better. Be "selfish" - make the ones around you happy and you will be more happy then ever. You deserve it, they deserve it.


Anonymous said...

Hi Tudor-Virgil

Nice reminder that we are all interrelated and the complexity of our needs does not allow us to only look after our own needs .. or to give them up for other people's needs.'Intelligently selfish' .. great!

I'd go further and say that one our human needs is to contribute to the well-being of others. From that point of view there is no such thing as altruism .. everything we do is in service of our needs. I prefer the term 'self-full' for this as 'selfish' has negative feel to it.


Tudor Constantin said...

Hi Ian!
First of all, thanks for reading, second, all you wrote, is what I had and still have in mind, but i wasn't able to form and expose in a clear, concise manner like you did. An awesome reply... thanks again. I have chosen a 'bad word' like selfish, just to help people to keep their minds open -- that what many consider to be bad might be in fact a really good thing -- and being selfish gets to be a good thing. We only have to stop acting on first impulse, we have to try to keep our minds as open as possible, first think, and only after that to act and things will be wonderful for all of us.

Anonymous said...

Nice post my friend. Let's share the happyness to the world.

Anonymous said...

nice post.
humans co-exist and how we are greatly influences the people around us, in the same way as how we are being influenced by the people we are with.

Calv said...

Heya thanks for dropping by my blog and left in as a follower :)

yours isnt so bad at all! I always enjoy reading up stuff of human's behavior and psychological cycle :)


Anonymous said...

Hi, Tudor-Virgil,
As humans, we all interact and influence one another. Our actions are like pigeons who flew away and came back. Usually, the more we give, the more we receive. More contributions would make the world a better and more lovely place. Thank you for sharing your view with us. It's a good reminder!

Banba said...

Just be careful that in trying to make everyone around you "happy" you don't become a people pleaser. What may work in the short run may eventually cause a person to lose the respect of others. That being said, I believe a positive outlook and a concern for others are two key ingredients to a successful life.

Gorgeous Ol' Eve Loves Vanilla. You? said...

Your blog is fun to read, some posts are enlightening as well as entertaining :) You're from Cluj, ay? I was there earlier this year for hols! I remember there were lots of snow LOL

Mell_f said...

HI Tudor-Virgil

"If you make the universe happy, the universe will make you happy back"

Indeed. I've been reading a book named 'The Secret',and the content is very much about the 'law of attraction' and it's no different with what i've quoted from you.

We should practice it then :)

rmacapobre said...

Richard Dawkins talks about the selfish gene in his book ..

Unknown said...

am i selfish, when i'm sleep, or selfull when eat ? let makes happy world, its inspire me...

Anonymous said...

Love the post!

Tikno said...

Nice post to be ponder.

Anonymous said...

Yes, the right balance has to be somewhere between 'selfless' and 'selfish' but at neither extreme.


Mckay K said...

This post has some interesting and thought provoking turns in it.

I think you explained yourself very well.

The selfishness you are speaking of is coming from a loving place. And as a result, the Universe must give you that type of love in return.

Great post!!!

Chaya said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Nice post! There is also so much more to this, but people first have to have a foundation and this is the beginnning. Keep writing you're doing a good job of reminding people of what they really are!

Anonymous said...

Fantastic post. Enlightened Self Interest is what I call it - I don't believe it is at odds with altruism and generosity. Fight Attendants say take care of yourself first - it's good advice for life, too.